Because they’re cool
I think mushrooms are so cool. I’ve always been fascinated by them. No, not the mind-screwing type (my mind is screwed enough without the help of illicit drugs!) I’ve got a nice little crop in my yard right now, they’ve been popping up for the past month or so. Komando does not share my fascination with the mushrooms. He pees on them then knocks them down. I’m thinking it may be a power thing…they’re one of the few things he is taller than!
Today is definitely one of those special requests from the Lafayette Chamber of Commerce…it is beautiful outside! As I write, it is in the upper sixties, low humidity, fabulous north wind blowing, and deep blue sunny skies out. A perfect, made-to-order day!
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Dear Daddy,
It’s me. I can’t imagine your reaction over me calling you ‘Daddy’, but I’m smiling over here just trying to picture it.
It’s festival season down here, as you well know, and you have been on my mind for some time. The Rice Festival was a week or two ago. Yes, I had plenty of invites, but, as usual, I turned them all down and stayed home. It’s just not something I can do. I know how much you love the Rice Festival. I wonder every year if it still draws you from wherever you call home these days.
I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, learning, and growing. So many things have happened in the past year that I don’t even know where to begin. I want you to know that I love you. I guess that is as good as a beginning as any.
As a mom, I understand the connection between a parent her child. I also understand that, out of everyone in a parent’s life, only your child can wound your heart in the deepest way possible. That lesson has been driven home hard for me. I apologize now if I’ve caused you that kind of pain.
I know you really wanted a son when I came out. I remember the ‘Hot Wheels’ for Christmas instead of the baby dolls I wanted. I remember you shoving tools in my hands when I was too young to understand what to even do with them. I mean, really, Daddy, what five-year-old really needs their own tool box?! Understand I’m smiling as I write this and it’s ok. You were later blessed with many sons. I haven’t been so lucky, but I do love my girls.
I’m surprised at how painful this is to write. There are so many things I’d love to talk to you about…bounce ideas off you…just to have an easygoing, loving relationship with you would be incredible. I suppose it’s just not meant to be. You do know I have forgiven all of the crappy stuff from the past. It’s just not worth carrying around anymore; I realized that a little bit ago. The older I get, the more I realize the importance of family connections. And here we are, with me not even having a clue as to where you are, whether or not you are dead or alive, whether or not you would even want to talk to me.
But you know, Daddy, that’s ok. I pray for you every day. Whenever I want to talk to you, I can write to you. Sometimes in public, like now, and sometimes in private, like so many times before. I realize this little letter has been all over the place, and doesn’t seem to have much of a point. I just want you to know how much I’ve been thinking about you lately, how much I love you, and that no matter what I do, I will always be your daughter. Besides, I’ve got your hair and eyes.
All of my love,
‘Deux’
Richelle
Tears of Joy
I listened to something this morning which…I just can’t describe right now. The tears are falling, but not of sadness. Tears of joy. Thank you God, for my life. The following is from ‘The Purpose Driven Life”. It applies to everyone. For me, it is profound.
You are who you are for a reason
You’re part of an intricate plan.
You’re a precious and perfect unique design
Called God’s special woman or man.
You look like you look for a reason
Our God made no mistake.
He knit you together within the womb
You’re just what He wanted to make.
The parents you had
Were the ones He chose
And no matter how you may feel
They were custom designed
With God’s plan in mind,
And they bear the Master’s seal.
Know that trauma you faced
Was not easy and God wept that it hurt you so.
But it was allowed to shape your heart
So that into His likeness you’d grow.
You are who you are for a reason
You’ve been formed by the Master’s rod.
You are who you are beloved.
Because there is a God.
Peace and blessings, everyone.
Lack of food delirium…
Boy today was certainly a Monday. I just dragged myself home about a half hour ago, and it is good to be here.
First and foremost on my tiny little brain is the strong desire for food. People, I mean a STRONG DESIRE for FOOD. I’m giving serious thought to grabbing my A1 Steak Sauce and a large steak knife then ‘borrowing’ one of my neighbor’s cows in the next field. I wonder if he would miss only one cow? Hey…I’d just be borrowing it anyway. I’d give it back!…just…not necessarily in the same condition I took it in. Hmmm. I’d slather A1 all over that cow and just help myself. Afterwards I’d be looking for a huge slice of strawberry cheesecake. And a tall glass of iced tea to wash all of this down.
Ok. It’s official. I am definitely feeling better. When I start complaining about food and the lack thereof, I know I’m on the right road.
As much fun as helping myself to a nice, healthy sized steak would be, it’s just not doable for me right now . My stomach would set me back two weeks. And I’ve made too much progress for that. So I settle for the lightest and simplest of foods right now…stuff that I know I can tolerate…plain mashed potatoes. I truly hope that this will stop at some point (soon) and I will be able to resume normal eating patterns. Because of this keeps up, I will be mistaken for a broomstick. But I think the awful mood this can put me in will run off anyone who ever thought they knew me.
Suck it up, Riccie. Listen to your doctor, he know’s what’s best.
Whaaaahhh! I just want to eat a normal plate of food!!!! I’m Cajun, for heaven sakes…we don’t do well when we have to go without good food for weeks at a time!
And a thought just stuck…I’d be a pretty cheap date! LOL
Which reminds me…I met a cop at the coffee shop today. Now, I know how odd that sounds. But, truly I met a cop. I was between clients, and it’s a place I usually go because I can connect with the wifi and get a few things done while I’m enjoying some coffee. This time I happened to sit a the bar, which faces the outside. The wall is all glass, so sitting at the bar you can pretty much see everything that’s going on. This guy is sitting about three stools down talking on a cell phone. I sat down and opened up my computer…and that’s as far as it got. Somehow or another we struck up a conversation. Major points for this guy. He can handle a decent conversation without resorting to all this sexual innuendo. More points for him. This guy was absolute eye candy. He was georgous. He was a bit older than me….but I guarantee he ate his Wheaties every morning…along with daily workouts….hmmmm…..yes. He was a looker. And so very sweet. Dark hair and blue eyes. (Me and the blasted blue eyes thing.) Where are the brown eyed men!!!
I had only one problem with this guy. Every so often he’d forget that my eyes were on my head, not just below my shoulders. Well, I suppose I have to take part blame there, though. I had on a sweater that fit me very well…and was pretty good about…hmmm…shall I say ’showing off my assets’? And believe me. I’ve been ‘blessed’. Poor guy. Kick in a little flirting and there could be some possibilities. Then he stood up. Oh my oh my. All 6′5” of him. He admitted earlier how tall he was. And built like nobodies business. I’m telling you, I had to make sure my tongue stayed in my mouth! We exchanged our ‘good evenings’ and such…then I got the incredible treat of watching him walk away. Now those khakis did him justice, I must say. And the light blue buttoned down shirt enhanced his shoulders and arms. I’m sure he had a nice big…gun strapped in there somewhere, but I didn’t want to know. The ultimate…when he got to his vehicle…it was a 4-door black crew cab pickup. Late model, probably this years. Ford. Oh my oh my I thought I would need some oxygen. Guys who want to impress me do not need to break out a Lexus or a BMW. Just show me your truck, sweetie. (Am I not country to the bone!) Disclaimer: no exchanging of cell phone numbers or email addresses occurred while Riccie was being a sexist pig. Hey, I know I’m feeling better when those kinds of thoughts drift into my head.
Bill
HTFWRM 102
…or, How to Frak with Riccie’s Mind : 102. At least, as it pertains to worship. Of course, it’s easy to frak with my mind. My brain is tiny as it is. I’ve experienced many mind fraks in the past several weeks (as have most people) but when it comes to worshipping my Lord, I’m so used to a rigid set of standards…when those are deviated from…I’m left with a mind frak. But I suppose that should be a good thing.
First off I am feeling much better today. My doc’s voodoo is beginning to work its magic, and I am happy with that. I was able to go to my class and to services today with no problem. When I got to class, I was greeted warmly and told that I was missed. (First mind frak: they actually remembered me and my name.) I already knew they’d noticed my absence last week because I got a really nice email with notes from the class during the week. Subject matter today was Jesus. We discussed a bit of His human nature and divine nature…but mostly His human nature. Jesus Christ. The original rebel!
After class I hung around in the greeting area for a bit and chit-chatted. I am not a person to hang around somewhere and chitchat with people I don’t know. But they have really good coffee, which is one of the few things that doesn’t seem to bother my stomach these days (I am truly a Cajun). I will never be accused of passing on a good cup of coffee. I ended up in a really interesting conversation with a young woman…she is twenty three. She shared a bit of her story with me which made me feel honored.
Now it’s time for services. The band is warming up, I’m reading through the outline, and as Kevin started to sing I looked up and realized I’d parked myself pretty much in the middle of the congregation. The door out seemed so far away…(Second mind frak: my need to worship and be a part of the group outweighed my need to stay near the door.) When Kevin finished up the first song, he took off his guitar and whipped out his cell phone. He then announces to the congregation “Will everyone please take out your cell phones and turn them on.” (Third mind frak: does this one need any more explanation?) My cell phone was locked safely away in the console in my truck. There is no one on this earth who is important enough to interrupt me while I am in church. So I’m really confused. Kevin had to announce it a few times…evidently I wasn’t the only one who was experiencing mind frak. He then had his cell number flashed up on screen, and the first person to call him got a prize. The first person to call him ended up being one of the church elders…and Kevin politely told him he didn’t count. He already had Kevin’s number on speed dial. LOL! A little girl using her mother’s cell phone did win ( a nice tee shirt.) Kevin then drove the point home…please don’t bring your phone to services with you- or, at the very least, TURN THEM OFF! Yep. That is also a pet peeve of mind…but who am I to say anything to anyone.
After the band’s wonderful performance we get to the message. (Fourth mind frak: read on.) This one, I think, was the biggest mind frak of all. Dennis approached the stage…and he is dressed in a pair of shorts and a polo shirt. Just as casually as he were going into his garage to work on a project instead of getting up to preach a message. I have never seen a pastor in such attire…at least, while he was ‘on the job’. I know, I know. Lord, You are telling me to expand my mind…I hear You. But You are totally twisting up over 40 years of ‘one way thinking’…it’ll just take me a bit. I’m good for the ride, Lord.
The message today was about criticism…how to handle criticism…something I know nothing about. (HA!) At the end of the message Dennis talked a bit about this huge shindig the church was having after services. Fifteen people were going to be baptized, and lots of good food and fellowship to go around. I had pretty much decided not to hang around…huge parties are not my thing. But the kind lady sitting next to me convinced me, as did Dennis talking about the baptisms. If nothing else, I wanted to see that.
So I find myself outside by the swimming pool, being greeted by all of these people. Don’t know where Lou was, I suppose she was doing her job. The food smelled absolutely wonderful Jambalya is not something I would normally pass up, and it was difficult to do so, but the way my stomach has rebelled against me recently I was not going to take a chance. So I settled for enjoying the aroma while sipping on my bottled water. I decided I was just going to watch the baptisms and go home, because by this time I was getting tired. By chance I ended up standing next to Kris, the small groups leader’s wife. John, the small groups leader, is also the instructor for the class I am taking. (I suppose it was no accident I ended up where I was…Lord, You do amazing work.) We had quite a conversation about faith. I have so many questions…like a small child. Kris was able to finally give me an adequate explanation on why Trinity does baptisms. I think I get it! While personally I am no where near ready to do anything like that, it is something that is bookmarked upon my tiny brain. One day, Dennis is going to dump me completely under the water. This is something I know I want. But I’ve got a long way to go and a lot to learn before that. Thank you, Kris and John. Also found out they were from Iowa. I asked them why south Louisiana? They told me they were actually living in Gary, Indiana before they moved down here, and they came here to be a part of Trinity. I thanked them both.
With a better understanding of the baptism according to TBC, I watched as fifteen people publicly declare their faith and promise to walk with Jesus Christ. (Fifth mind frak.)
I did leave after watching this. My mind can’t take any more today!
Power shift
That’s the best way I can describe it.
It’s been an interesting few months.
I’ve learned so much about myself, and the learning continues. One thing I’m surprised about is the personal power I am beginning to feel. No, not power in the sense of ‘I’m going to take over the world’…more like grabbing and maintaining control over my own life. There’s a tremendous sense of satisfaction it that. Odd thing is that I’d always thought I was in control before. Handing my life over to Him every morning really changes things within my heart.
There is one aspect of my life I want to do a little changing with and that is ‘being a girl’. I find more and more I’m wanting to express my feminine side. In small ways…like lacy frilly underthings only I know about. And clothes that fit and sorta show off my curves. And maybe growing out my hair a bit…not being so severe with it. Heck, I’m female. And more comfortable with myself than I have ever been.
No, not for any man. For me. Riccie. Because I am a female. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Nor is there anything wrong with showing it off a bit.
Thank you, Lord.
About the Accent…
…or lack thereof. To BB and Mik: Within my treasure chest of talents is the ability to pop out with a hard-core almost unintelligible Cajun accent at will. On a day-to-day basis, my ‘accent’ is something that has faded with time. I think the combination of traveling, education, years of public speaking courses, and the desire to be clearly heard has destroyed whatever natural accent I had. When I am out of my home state (which, admittedly, isn’t all that often these days, but will change soon enough) people are surprised to find out I am from Louisiana…south Louisiana, at that. But I am 100% pure Cajun! Yes, indeed.
Yall got me to thinking. Maybe I’ll think of something interesting to say (no uhhss and ands like last time) and post in my voice again, only with a heavy-duty Cajun accent. That would be fun. Just gotta think of something to say…
The Ten Commandments…Cajun-style
(Keeps It Real Simple)
2. Don’t pray to nuttin’ or nobody… jus’ God.
